Finding Gratitude on a Sunday Night

Before I had children, weekends were for recharging the batteries, so to speak, from the frustrations and mundanities (new word – I made it up) of the week.  Weekends with infant triplets are decidedly unrestful (another new word).  When you have three there is more than likely one or more crying or whining at any one moment.  Not bitching here, it’s a fact.  It’s also a fact that my wife handles it a lot better than I.

There are truthfully moments when I wonder whether it’s worth it.  It’s a shift in perspective when I actually look forward to the work week for more structure and less stress, for time to work on artistic projects which make me feel more alive and fulfilled.  These are a form of recharging in and of itself.

It is 8:00 on a Sunday evening and these are the first moments I’ve been able to steal away to do some writing apart from a comment I spent three minutes on this morning after spending nine minutes reading an article by Everett Bogue.

For the abundance of ideas that spark conversation and sharing on the Internet, I am grateful.

So I popped on an MP3 of Endless Reverie by the remarkable and beautiful Azam Ali and in 5:48 I am feeling more at peace, the words now pouring forth.

For the beauty in music and the peace it can provide, I am grateful.

I am lucky in many ways and there are moments when I catch myself just before my head is about to explode.  I know of people who have attempted In Vitro Fertilization ten or more times without success and yet we were thrice blessed on our second attempt.  I suppose I should share that story sometime, in the hopes that it might help others who may have despair over building a family, but this article is not for that.

For the doctors, clinicians, scientists, nurses, and all of the shoulders they stand upon, I am grateful.

I am seemingly amongst a shrinking minority of first world families who can live very fruitfully on one income and I have a wife who has developed infinite patience for raising three babies and dealing with a fourth who often acts like a baby (that would be me in case I was being obtuse).

For my job, the generous Healthcare benefits provided by my employer, and the generous salary I reap, I am grateful.

For my wife who by all rights could do much better than me, I am most grateful.

My children are a miracle, two of them born under two pounds and the third just over that mark.  There were many times in the early months when the slightest movement in the incubator prompted joy.  When they would cry as the doctors took blood, we would feel their pain yet we rejoiced as the cries were a sign of the progress they made.  Now, seemingly, when my daughter has spent most of today screaming, whining and crying, I remind myself of those early days.

I am thankful for the fight that my daughter has in her, and my two sons.  They’ve been through so much and have stared death in the face numerous times.  For them and the example they set, I am thankful.

I went to the gym today, it is my third time in a week, but previous to that I had gone four weeks without any training, despite my New Year’s Resolutions.  I have a goal to run the 2010 Buffalo Marathon at the end of May and I had built a schedule of what days I should run and how many miles.  Today I was to run ten miles if I were following it precisely, but on Friday I was only able to run a mile due to my lack of fitness and the amount of time I had taken off.

I ran seven today and though my right hip makes me wince in pain every time I bend to grab something, I am very grateful for having the faculties to be able to run, the opportunities to do so, and enough perseverance to break through my perceived barriers.

For the United States Olympic hockey team and our hometown goalie, Ryan Miller, despite the heartbreaking loss today, I am very grateful for the effort you all put forth, and how you defied the odds-makers by taking Silver.

And now, twenty minutes have passed, my fingers have typed about eight hundred words, I am feeling much better  having acknowledged these small, but beautiful things in my life.

For my ability to write and for those of you who take the time to read this, I am very grateful.

Namaste.

Now off to soothe a screaming baby…

Tagged as: cry, grateful, human interest, in vitro fertilization, moments, new words, speeches, whine